I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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