So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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