omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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