It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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