we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize