wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
