chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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