I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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