Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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