omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
