I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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