So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
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The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
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If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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