Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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