Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
