Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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