let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
