ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.