a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
