shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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