I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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