For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
