she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I wish there were birth control emojis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
My feet surprised me
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