I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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