I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
