I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I think my moral compass just broke
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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