Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
