That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
