He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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