I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
