xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
