Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
