She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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