I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
His nipple licking is glorious
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