All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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