Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Randomize
