I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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