I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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