You can't motorboat a personality
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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