I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
