someone threw a dead crab at me
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Randomize