I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
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Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
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Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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