Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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