its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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