i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
