I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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