I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
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You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
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It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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