we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
