she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize
