So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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