What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
