what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
